ACT ONE
FADE IN
EXT. ROAD - DAY - CLOSE ON HOOD ORNAMENT
With the sound of classical music playing softly in the
b.g., we open tight on a highly polished, extremely ornate
hood ornament. It glistens majestically in the morning sun.
Pull back to reveal a beautifully restored Pennington Aston
Regency. Behind the wheel, looking his dapper best in a
blazer and silk tie, is Devon Miles, blissfully content as
he cruises down the nearly deserted road. Suddenly something
strikes the rear of his car. Devon reacts, horrified, looks
in the rearview mirror.
DEVON'S POINT OF VIEW - A LATE MODEL CONVERTIBLE
driven by a young Blonde. She's wearing dark glasses.
BACK TO DEVON
He slows and pulls over, more distraught than one would
expect. The convertible follows.
ANOTHER ANGLE
Devon hurries to the rear of the car and inspects the
damage. We hear a car door open, high heels crunching on
gravel and a giggle.
BLONDE'S VOICE
Uh oh....
Devon looks up sharply to see long legs. The Blonde is
holding her hand over her mouth, giggling and weaving
slightly.
DEVON
Madam, is that all you can say?
Uh-oh?
BLONDE
Oh, you're mad. Don't be mad. It's
such a beautiful day.
DEVON
(controlled)
I acknowledge your appreciation of
God's good graces. I only wish it
extended to man's endeavors as
well. What you just so carelessly
struck, and dented, is one of the
few remaining Pennington Aston
Regencies in the world.
(darkly)
And it's not mine.
She hiccups.
BLONDE
Bobby's going to kill me...Just
kill me.
Devon takes in the picture, including the fact this young
woman is probably intoxicated.
DEVON
Madam, your attention such as it is
would be appreciated. I need identi-
fication, your insurance company --
you are insured, aren't you?
BLONDE
Bobby is. It's his car. My purse
...it's in the front seat. Could
you? Please? I don't feel very
good....
Devon sighs, crosses to her car.
ON DEVON
searching for the purse in the convertible. It's not
there. Suddenly we hear the Pennington start up. Devon
turns, sees it move out smartly and start down the road.
He's aghast. He races to catch up, but it's far too late.
He can't believe his eyes. The young Blonde honks twice
and waves before she disappears from sight.
CUT TO
EXT. ANOTHER HIGHWAY - DAY - ON THE TRANS AM
cruising along about seventy.
INT. TRANS AM - DAY
Michael's driving. He looks carefree.
MICHAEL
He looked great in the blazer,
didn't he?
K.I.T.T.
I had the distinct impression he
was trying to impress the car.
MICHAEL
Can you blame him? The Pennington
Aston Regency is a classic.
K.I.T.T. doesn't reply.
MICHAEL
Not that you're not in its class,
Kitt.
K.I.T.T. doesn't reply. Michael suspects sensitivities.
MICHAEL
Actually you're in a class by your-
self. One of a kind.
Devon's tone sounds. Michael smiles, punches buttons on the
roof.
MICHAEL
Devon! How'd April tear you away
from the Pennington?
INTERCUT - DEVON ON MONITOR IN HIS OFFICE
He looks grave.
DEVON
The Pennington has been stolen,
Michael.
MICHAEL
(shocked)
What?
DEVON
Please. I'll explain the details
later. The point is Commander Smythe
will be returning first thing Monday
morning. Today's Friday in case
you've forgotten. If the Commander
returns and I don't have the Pennington
here waiting for him....
MICHAEL
Say no more, Devon. We're on our way.
CUT TO
HIGHWAY SHOTS - THE TRANS AM
does a 180, heads back in the opposite direction. Music
over. Several more shots of K.I.T.T. stretching out on the
highways....
DISSOLVE TO
EXT. FOUNDATION SEMI - DAY
moving down a highway. The Trans Am appears, the semi's
ramp lowers and K.I.T.T. drives inside. Hold as the semi
continues down the road.
INT. SEMI - DAY
April's at the computer console. Michael's looking over her
shoulder. In the b.g., Devon paces nervously.
MICHAEL
You're sure it was planned?
DEVON
It was a professional job. If only
I could've been rude and told her
to fetch her own purse.
MICHAEL
(smiles)
A gentleman to the end.
(to April)
What've you got?
APRIL
(punches up
graphics)
In recent months, there's been a rash
of custom and classic car thefts. The
'bump-and-run' is the newest technique.
MICHAEL
If that's all you've got to go on,
somebody's in a lot of trouble.
Devon looks over, brow furrowed.
DEVON
Must you be so...never mind. Besides,
it's not all we have. April?
APRIL
We think we've come up with a common
denominator. In every town where
there's been a theft, there's also
been a custom car show not far away.
MICHAEL
Makes sense. The shows attract the
cars...and the potential buyers.
DEVON
Which is precisely why you're
heading to Barton Springs.
Devon fishes in his pocket, comes out with a flyer which he
hands to Michael. Michael looks at the leaflet: "Barton
Springs Custom and Classic Car Show. This Weekend Only!"
DEVON
If they want to sell the Pennington,
this is the logical place. I want
you to go undercover, Michael. I
have a feeling this market doesn't
operate with ads and 'For Sale' signs.
MICHAEL
You must have some idea what she
looked like.
DEVON
I wish that were true. It all hap-
pened so quickly...she was pretty,
shapely and blonde....
APRIL
Maybe blonde. I went over the car.
Not only was it stolen, it was abso-
lutely clean. Except for a single
strand of hair...
(punches computer)
I ran it through Kitt's chemical
analyzer...it's Elura, Michael.
MICHAEL
A wig.
APRIL
A very expensive wig.
Michael checks the monitor, frowns. The phone buzzes.
April reaches for it.
MICHAEL
Not much to go on, Devon.
DEVON
Michael, I would greatly appreciate
a little optimism.
APRIL
Devon, it's for you...Commander
Smythe.
Devon looks stricken, shakes his head silently, waves his
hands. Michael knows a cue when he sees one, starts for
K.I.T.T.
MICHAEL
See ya.
CUT TO
EXT. HIGHWAY - DAY - ON THE TRANS AM
heading for Barton Springs.
K.I.T.T.'S VOICE
Michael, I've done some research
on customizing. It's absolutely
barbaric.
INT. TRANS AM - DAY
K.I.T.T.'s lights are blinking.
MICHAEL
Barbaric?
K.I.T.T.
Yes. Do you have any idea what is
done to these cars? They're painted,
cut, molded, covered with decals and
chrome. And why?
MICHAEL
Don't ask me, pal. Call it individual
expression.
K.I.T.T.
(indignantly)
Individual expression? How would
you feel if someone decided to extend
your nose, remove your ears, lengthen
your neck and paint your body candy-
apple red?
Michael laughs.
CUT TO
EXT. CAR SHOW PAVILLION - DAY
A crowd's already beginning to gather for the show, and the
mood is festive: booths sell food, t-shirts, programs, etc.
People are tailgating, picnicking. Kids with ghetto
blasters. In the b.g. we see the Trans Am pull up, park.
Michael gets out, crosses through the crowd to the contes-
tant's area, where a number of car owners are unloading,
registering and getting ready to take their cars inside.
ANGLE ON MICHAEL
He passes a radically customized car, pauses, glances at its
owner, a pretty girl in her early twenties. Her name is
Carrie Haver. She is meticulously polishing chrome.
MICHAEL
Nice car.
CARRIE
Thanks.
She seems friendly. They smile.
MICHAEL
Can you tell me who runs the show?
CARRIE
A lady named Suzanne Westen.
(points)
She's over there. Look for the
tightest pants.
MICHAEL
(smiles)
Thanks.
He leaves. She watches him for a brief moment, returns to
her car.
THE CONTESTANT'S ENTRANCE
where Suzanne Westen, clipboard in hand, is standing. She's
a tall, striking woman in her late twenties or early
thirties.
Great figure. She looks more sophisticated than the people
around her. A city girl. Michael approaches her, affects
a slightly hip attitude.
MICHAEL
Miss Westen?
She doesn't bother to look up from her clipboard. She nods.
MICHAEL
I'm Michael Knight. I'm a
collector. Couple of friends told
me I hadn't seen a show til I saw
one of yours. From what I can see
they weren't just blowing smoke.
Suzanne glances over the top of her clipboard to see who's
talking. She takes Michael in with a glance.
SUZANNE
It'll be the best show this season.
MICHAEL
That's good to hear. I came looking
to buy a car. Something special.
Unfortunately, the best buys aren't
always available on the 'open market.'
Sometimes privacy is as important as
pink slips.
SUZANNE
I just run a car show, Michael. I
don't handle private sales. But come
to the party tonight at the Barton
Springs Inn, mingle a little, get to
know the owners. Who knows what a
good-looking man like you might turn
up.
The moment is broken by a commotion dominated by a thick
Texas accent. Suzanne mutters something under her breath
that's not kind.
THE LONGHORN
The world's longest limo, with a set of Longhorn steer horns
on the hood. Next to the limo is Buck Rayburn and his wife,
Nora. Buck's short, heavy, wearing a cowboy hat and
chomping a cigar. Nora's tall, almost regal, and looking
incredibly bored with everything around her. Buck's
shouting, pushing people out of the Longhorn's way,
gesturing to his driver.
BUCK
Move it, folks...y'all are gonna have
plenty of time to gawk inside. Move
aside and let the Longhorn come through.
Take her inside, Ray, and hit 'em if
they touch the paint.
Buck spots Suzanne, grabs Nora by the arm and pulls her over
with him. Michael smiles, ad-libs good-bye to Suzanne and
crosses back toward K.I.T.T. We hear Buck's booming voice:
BUCK
We gotta have a little talk, Suzanne.
I was promised the primo spot in the
tent and I arrive to find it's been
given to that Haver girl. You gotta
figure out who your star is, sweetheart.
ANGLE ON MICHAEL
as he passes by Carrie.
CARRIE
Find her?
MICHAEL
Yeah, thanks.
(gestures to
Longhorn)
Is that your competition?
CARRIE
(angry)
The best money can buy. It's even
got a Jacuzzi inside, for those who
can't wait to get home.
MICHAEL
(smiles)
Are you going to the party tonight?
CARRIE
It's a command performance. You?
MICHAEL
(nods)
Maybe I'll see you there.
She smiles, turns and heads for the tent. Jan and Dean,
two blond surfer-types with a custom van, fall in next to
her, whisper something in her ear. She stops in her tracks,
turns and says something back to them. They look surprised
and then laugh uproariously.
JAN
Little lady's got a mouth, Dean.
DEAN
That ain't all. You could set a
watch to that movement.
Michael watches the exchange, grins as Carrie turns and
walks into the tent. As Michael wanders across the grounds,
he passes:
HECTOR AND LEROY
Two members of the rented janitorial staff. They're
supposed to be cleaning the grounds with long-handled whisk
brooms and ridiculous little dust pans, but mainly they're
gawking, walking and talking.
LEROY
Lookit that blonde...those pants
have got to be painted on.
HECTOR
She'd make a great cheerleader.
LEROY
Will you forget cheerleaders? Who
cares about credentials? I'm talking
flesh. You know what it takes to
get that kind of flesh? Big bucks,
Hector. Big bucks...or a hot car.
Hector looks like one of the great mysteries of life has
just opened for him. Leroy nods sagely.
CUT TO
EXT. BARTON SPRINGS MOTEL - AT THE POOL - NIGHT
Japanese lanterns of all colors surround the huge pool.
Rock music. Waiters circulate with drinks and hors
d'oeuvres. People are clustered, laughing and talking. In
the middle of the action, we see Michael, sport coat and
slacks, talking to several owners. They shake their
heads. Michael smiles politely and moves on.
ANOTHER ANGLE - FEATURE THE POOL
Where Jan and Dean have cornered two young lovelies in the
shallow end. Dean's got a diving mask on and is making like
Jaws in the water. The girls shriek with laughter as Jan
reaches up, grabs an entire tray of drinks from a passing
waiter for their party.
ON MICHAEL
moving through the crowd. He stops, chats briefly with
another group, then moves past the pool, toward:
THE PARKING LOT - FEATURE K.I.T.T.
His scanner scanning, parked near the entrance to the pool
and party area. Michael walks up.
MICHAEL
How're you doing, pal?
K.I.T.T.
I'm doing just as you asked, Michael
-- snapping pictures of every woman
who walks by. I feel absolutely
ludicrous. Like a second-rate spy
in a 'B' movie....
MICHAEL
It's got to be done, Kitt. Devon
just might be able to ID someone.
K.I.T.T.
I suppose. Are you making any prog-
ress?
MICHAEL
No bites yet. I'm going to keep
working the party, letting people
know I'm in the market.
K.I.T.T.
Working the party? You call making
small talk and drinking margaritas
working?
MICHAEL
It's a tough job, but someone's
got to do it. Keep your eyes open
and your shutter snapping.
Michael smiles, turns and heads back to the party.
ANGLE BETWEEN PARKING AREA AND POOL
Carrie and Suzanne are in a heated conversation.
SUZANNE
Don't be stupid. This is a chance
to do something with your life.
CARRIE
Thanks for your interest, but in case
you didn't notice, I already am.
SUZANNE
Towing your father's dream around?
Carrie, the car was his fixation, not
yours. I'll give you twenty thousand
cash.
Carrie glares at Suzanne, stung by her words. Over this we
see Michael appear, approaching. They don't notice him.
CARRIE
The car's not for sale, Suzanne. Not
now. Not ever.
Carrie starts to leave, but Suzanne grabs her by the arm.
SUZANNE
Even first prize won't give you
enough money to cover the overdue
mortgage -- not to mention the
personal loan he left you with.
CARRIE
(furious)
You've been spying on me!
SUZANNE
Twenty grand. That's as high as
I'll go. If you're smart, you'll
take it.
Suzanne turns and walks back toward the party. Carrie stands
for a beat, then turns to hurry away from the party. She
nearly runs into Michael.
MICHAEL
Hey, what's the hurry?
CARRIE
What are you doing here?
MICHAEL
Just passing by. I couldn't help
but overhear you and Suzanne. You
okay?
CARRIE
Sure I'm okay. It's just some of
these people...it's like my dad never
existed. 'Eddie Haver died? Great.
Maybe his kid's desperate. Maybe we
can buy his dream for fifty cents on
the dollar....'
As she talks, Carrie's tough facade slowly crumbles and her
voice cracks. Michael takes her into his arms.
MICHAEL
Hey, it'll be all right. Let 'em
laugh now. They'll cry come Sunday
when the judges announce the winner.
She moves out of Michael's arms, wipes her eyes, tries a
smile.
MICHAEL
How about breakfast tomorrow?
CARRIE
I planned to be at the show by seven.
MICHAEL
I'll grab some doughnuts and coffee
and we'll drive over together.
She studies him for a beat, then smiles, nods.
CARRIE
Sure you're not just trying to sweet-
talk me because you want to buy my
car?
MICHAEL
With coffee and doughnuts for a bribe?
He shakes his head. She laughs and leaves, turns back to
ad-lib good night. Michael smiles, watches her leave.
ANOTHER ANGLE
Michael heads back toward the pool and to the rest of the
party. Suddenly Suzanne's next to him, slipping her arm
through his. She smiles suggestively.
SUZANNE
She's a schoolgirl. Cute, but really
not in your league. When you're ready
to graduate to someone who can match
you move for move, stop by and say
hello. Room 334.
Just as quickly, she's gone. Michael contemplates the
events.
CUT TO
EXT. PAVILLION - EARLY A.M.
Near the entrance, we see the night guard, Don Jensen, sit-
ting in his folding chair. The morning paper's on his chest,
right below his chin. Jensen snores softly.
ANOTHER ANGLE NEAR THE PAVILLION
The shadow of a figure disappears inside the pavillion.
Jensen stirs slightly, gets comfortable, continues sleeping.
In the b.g. we see the Trans Am pulling into the parking
lot.
ON THE TRANS AM
as Michael and Carrie get out, start toward the pavillion.
MICHAEL
...anyway, that's why I'm here. I
was looking for something classic
...like maybe a Pennington Ascot
Regency.
He glances at her, trying to detect any reaction. There's
none.
CARRIE
I haven't seen one of those in years.
MICHAEL
You know most of the people here?
CARRIE
Some. Mostly by reputation. They're
an odd collection....
MICHAEL
What about Suzanne?
CARRIE
She's the kind of woman who wants
something if someone else has it --
cars, men, it doesn't matter.
As they approach the pavillion entrance, they react to the
sound of a car starting up inside. Jensen stirs, bolts up.
CARRIE
That's...my car!
MOVING SHOT
They run for the entrance.
ANGLE ON JENSEN
Closer, he draws his weapon and starts inside. We hear the
engine roar, in gear.
ANOTHER ANGLE
Just as Jensen starts inside, the tent disintegrates as
Carrie's car roars out, knocking down anything in its way,
including Jensen. Clipped by the front bumper, he goes
down. Carrie screams.
WIDER ANGLE
Michael runs up and kneels over Jensen as Carrie's car, the
driver still obscured, bursts away in a trail of hot rubber.
Michael feels Jensen's pulse with one hand.
MICHAEL
(comlink)
Kitt, over here, quick!
Carrie hurries over, stunned.
CARRIE
Oh, my God, is he...dead?
MICHAEL
No, he should be okay -- call an
ambulance!
INTERCUT - K.I.T.T.
His systems come to life and he peels out, headed for
Michael.
ANOTHER ANGLE
As Carrie reaches for a nearby phone, K.I.T.T. skids to a
stop, door flying open. Michael jumps in and with smoking
rear tires, heads out in pursuit.
OMITTED
EXT. NEARBY STREET - DAY
Carrie's car flashes by, approaching 100 mph, its driver
still not visible. Pan back a good quarter mile down the
road and K.I.T.T. appears, still accelerating.
INT. K.I.T.T. - DAY
Michael intent behind the wheel.
K.I.T.T.
Michael, there's a train track less
than a mile ahead.
MICHAEL
As long as there's no train.
K.I.T.T.
That's precisely my point. There is.
MICHAEL
(punches
button)
Let's get a scan on the monitor.
INSERT - MONITOR
We see the graphic of the road, transected by railroad
tracks, a red light identifying the approaching train.
BACK TO MICHAEL
MICHAEL
Can Carrie's car make it?
K.I.T.T.
It's unlikely. If it does, it will
be by the skin of its bumper.
MICHAEL
What about us?
K.I.T.T.
Certainly not in the conventional way.
EXT. RAILROAD TRACKS - DAY
The train, a slow-moving freight, appraoches the road,
wood guard rails already down.
A HOBO
He is encamped nearby, heating his breakfast of canned
pork-'n-beans over a tiny flame.
REVERSE ANGLE
Carrie's car suddenly appears, doing over 100 mph.
HIGH SHOT
Just as the freight reaches the crossing, Carrie's car
splinters through the guard rails and shoots across the
track, missed by inches by the huge engine.
ANGLE ON HOBO
He stares, amazed.
INT. K.I.T.T. - DAY
Michael checks the road ahead, shakes his head.
MICHAEL
Get ready, pal.
K.I.T.T.
Michael, if we fail to reach the
necessary height for clearance we'll
end up customized by a freight train.
ANGLE ON HOBO
Continuing on his journey, he now sees K.I.T.T. approaching
at incredible speed. He holds his hands to his ears, as
if to muffle the crash.
ANGLE IN K.I.T.T.
Michael presses Turbo Boost.
WIDE ANGLE
K.I.T.T. lifts off, flying up, higher and higher....
FADE OUT
END OF ACT ONE
ACT TWO
FADE IN
EXT. TRAIN - DAY
K.I.T.T. clears the top with only a foot or two to spare.
ANGLE ON ROAD OVER TRAIN
K.I.T.T. lands, still moving forward at amazing speed.
ANGLE IN K.I.T.T.
Michael stares ahead, reacts.
HIS POINT OF VIEW - THE ROAD AHEAD
is empty. Deserted.
BACK TO MICHAEL
MICHAEL
What?!
K.I.T.T.
My thoughts exactly, Michael.
MICHAEL
He couldn't have just disappeared!
Kitt, are you sure your scanner's
working?
K.I.T.T.
Positive. I hate to say it, Michael,
but Carrie's car is nowhere in my
field of vision.
On Michael's perplexed, frustrated expression:
CUT TO
EXT. PAVILLION AREA - DAY
Pan from K.I.T.T., parked, past a dozen or so people who've
gathered to an ambulance as it pulls out.
ANOTHER ANGLE
Michael waits as Carrie finishes answering MOS questions
from a police officer.
ANGLE ON RAYBURN AND NORA
as they move quickly toward the pavillion, Suzanne at their
side.
SUZANNE
We've got a contract!
RAYBURN
No contract in the world's gonna
keep the Longhorn here overnight
again! Lucky for me the thief was
graced with bad taste an' didn't
steal the 'Horn' as it is!
SUZANNE
I could sue you, Rayburn.
NORA
Not without a counter-suit, Sweetpea
-- your contract guaranteed adequate
security.
They disappear into the tent. Suzanne stares after them,
furious.
ANGLE ON MICHAEL AND CARRIE
as they move away from the police toward K.I.T.T.
CARRIE
...They said they'll do their best,
which is a sure sign they've got no
hope of recovering it.
MICHAEL
(a smile)
Now don't make it worse than it is.
No response from her; Michael can see how deeply disap-
pointed she is. Makes a decision.
MICHAEL
I'll let you in on a little secret.
I'm not here as a buyer. I'm here
to find out who's been stealing
these cars.
CARRIE
What are you, an undercover cop?
MICHAEL
Something like that. I'll find your
car, Carrie. Or grow old trying.
She glances at him, finally smiles.
CARRIE
If it takes that long, I'm in real
trouble.
(beat)
Thanks.
She sees something off, reacts.
CARRIE
If you had anything to do with this ---
ANOTHER ANGLE
We see Suzanne approaching.
SUZANNE
If that's an accusation, you'd
better be able to back it up.
CARRIE
If I could back it up you wouldn't
be standing there with your eye
shadow so perfectly overdone.
SUZANNE
You've got a smart mouth for a girl
who just traded in her training bra,
sweetie.
MICHAEL
Now ladies, please -- nobody's
feeling very good right now, and
this won't make anyone feel any
better. Let's call it a draw and
retire to neutral corners.
He smiles. They glare.
SUZANNE
(to Michael)
You're cute. Let me know when your
taste in women catches up with your
capabilities.
She walks off, a perfect rhythm to her. Carrie steams.
Michael laughs, puts his arm around her, guiding her away.
MICHAEL
I don't think the lady knows what
'neutral' means. C'mon, I'll buy
you a lemonade. A double.
CUT TO
EXT. OPEN ROAD - DAY
K.I.T.T. swooshes by.
DEVON'S VOICE
I've studied all the photos Kitt's
transmitted....
INT. K.I.T.T. - DAY
Michael is driving, Devon is on the monitor in his office.
DEVON
Nothing, I'm afraid. I'm beginning
to wonder if I'd recognize her if we
bumped into one another at the
supermarket.
MICHAEL
You don't go to supermarkets.
DEVON
True. Still, you see my point.
MICHAEL
Devon, what've you come up with
on the promoter, Suzanne Westen?
DEVON
I wondered when you'd ask. I rather
fancy her myself. Except for her
arrest record, of course.
MICHAEL
Arrest record? Don't tell me it was
car theft.
DEVON
Very good. Two counts of grand theft
auto, no conviction.
MICHAEL
Interesting lady. I wonder if she
has an affinity for wigs....
DEVON
Before you go, I think you should know
things have not been going well with
Commander Smythe. He's had a change
in plans. He'll be here tomorrow.
Michael, I'm a mature man. I don't
handle human frailties well, particu-
larly my own. I do not, under any
circumstances, intend to face the
Commander carless.
MICHAEL
Gotcha, Devon.
Michael punches off the video, smiles to himself.
CUT TO
EXT. MOTEL - DAY
K.I.T.T. is parked outside.
INT. SUITE - DAY
Camera pans from a blonde wig across the suit to the door
as it quietly opens and Michael slips in.
MICHAEL
(comlink)
Thanks, pal.
Intercut: K.I.T.T.'s scanner flashes. Michael sees the
dresser, the blonde wig resting on a styrofoam head. He
crosses to it, carefully pulls out several strands of hair
and puts them in an envelope. Realizes he's tilted the
wig, goes to straighten it and sees something written above
the temple. Michael looks closer. The letters "CB - JR
- JW" are written on the styrofoam.
MICHAEL
(comlink)
Kitt, remember the letters 'CB - JR
- JW.'
K.I.T.T.'S VOICE
Michael, someone is approaching the
door.
Michael hears the sound of a key in the door, reacts.
MICHAEL
(comlink)
Could've used a little more notice,
pal.
K.I.T.T.
I'm a computer, not a prognosticator.
The door opens and Suzanne enters. There's nothing for
Michael to do but smile.
MICHAEL
I suppose you want to know what I'm
doing here.
SUZANNE
(walking
toward him)
I know exactly what you're doing
here.
(smiles)
It's just sooner than I expected.
Tired of that poor child already?
Heartbreaker. You need a woman who
can match you in every room in the
house, not just the pantry.
By now she is face to face with him.
MICHAEL
Suzanne, maybe we ought to get a few
things straight.
SUZANNE
(kisses him;
moves)
We will, lover. Don't be so
impatient. I'll let you know when.
She passes by the phone, business obviously on her mind.
SUZANNE
Now shoo.
She blows him a kiss. Relieved, he leaves.
EXT. MOTEL - DAY - LONG SHOT
as Michael leaves Suzanne's room. Pan with him reveals
Carrie, watching. She looks angry and sad.
ANGLE ON K.I.T.T.
as Michael climbs in.
K.I.T.T.
Michael, was the intruder dangerous?
MICHAEL
Not in the usual way.
(places hairs
in electrotray)
Let's see if the lady is a tramp.
K.I.T.T.'s computers whir.
INSERT - MONITOR
Brilliant colors compare the two hairs.
BACK TO MICHAEL
K.I.T.T.
Sorry, Michael. As you can see, the
hair from Suzanne's wig is a coarse
synthetic. It comes from a cheaper
wig.
MICHAEL
There's more wigs floating around
here than Miami Beach.
He starts K.I.T.T. and pulls out.
CUT TO
EXT. PAVILLION - DAY
Saturday afternoon, lots of spectators milling about, a
sprinkling of kids and dogs. Balloons, hot dogs and cold
pop.
ANOTHER ANGLE
K.I.T.T. pulls in to a stop. Michael gets out.
MICHAEL
Stay on those numbers, Kitt.
K.I.T.T.
Michael, I'm convinced they're to a
combination lock -- but where that
particular type of lock is at
present is an entirely different
matter.
MICHAEL
Good. Don't want to make things too
easy for you.
He smiles and moves off.
K.I.T.T.
Talk about being taken for granted.
ANGLE ON HECTOR AND LEROY
They move through the crowd with their brooms and dust pans.
LEROY
You gonna do this all your life?
HECTOR
What?
LEROY
Stare at the ground an' prowl for
cigarette butts an' candy wrappers.
HECTOR
I don't want to hear any more lec-
tures about smoking, Leroy.
LEROY
I'm not talking about smoking,
beetle-brain, I'm talking about this.
Common labor. How many cheerleaders
you gonna get on $2.25 an hour?
HECTOR
Is that all we make?
LEROY
Hector, I'm telling you, you want
cheerleaders, you gotta have a fancy
car.
HECTOR
On $2.25 an hour?
LEROY
What you make don't necessarily
determine how you live. Look at the
guy who stole the car last night.
He didn't work for that car -- but
he's got it.
From the look on Hector's face we see he understands. He's
scared to death at the thought. But intrigued.
ANGLE ON MICHAEL
as he looks for Carrie, who's nowhere to be seen. He spots
Jan hustling a pretty girl in tight shorts.
MICHAEL
Excuse me. Have you seen Carrie
Haver around?
JAN
Somebody stole her car.
MICHAEL
So I heard. Have you seen her?
JAN
(shakes
his head)
Don't waste your time. All she's
got eyes for is chrome and twenty
coats of lacquer.
Michael ad-libs thanks, turns. His comlink beeps.
MICHAEL
Yeah, Kitt.
K.I.T.T.'S VOICE
Michael, the impossible once again
becomes commonplace.
MICHAEL
(comlink)
Got a fix on the lock, Kitt?
K.I.T.T.'S VOICE
Better than that. I can tell you
where it is.
CUT TO
EXT. WAREHOUSE - DAY
Pan from K.I.T.T., scanner on, to Michael at the warehouse
door. He turns the combination to CB-JR-JW and the big
lock opens. Michael nods to K.I.T.T. and starts inside.
K.I.T.T.'S VOICE
Michael, I hate to disillusion you,
but someone else is breaking into
the warehouse from the south end.
MICHAEL
Thanks, pal.
INT. WAREHOUSE - DAY
Michael peers in.
HIS POINT OF VIEW
Across the vast, empty space (certainly no stolen cars) we
see a figure wearing a motorcycle helmet half in a window.
The figure sees him, darts back outside.
ANGLE ON MICHAEL
He runs toward the south end.
ANOTHER ANGLE
As Michael appears around the corner of the building, the
figure jumps onto a motorcycle and roars off.
MICHAEL
(comlink)
Kitt, around back!
ANGLE ON K.I.T.T.
All systems spring to life.
ANOTHER ANGLE
K.I.T.T. comes speeding up, driver door popping open.
Michael jumps in and pulls out in a cloud of dust.
ANGLE ON SUZANNE
Approaching the warehouse in her car, she sees the motor-
cyclist and Michael and K.I.T.T. in pursuit.
EXT. STREET - DAY
The motorcycle flies by.
ANOTHER ANGLE
K.I.T.T. flies by.
ANOTHER STREET
The motorcycle turns a sharp right, almost collides with a
milk truck, zigzags past, shaken.
ANGLE ON K.I.T.T.
He rounds the same corner, sees the milk truck.
ANGLE ON MICHAEL
He presses a button.
MICHAEL
Make us skinny, Kitt.
ANOTHER ANGLE
K.I.T.T. goes onto the two right tires, slides by the
stalled milk truck with inches to spare.
ANGLE ON DRIVER
He stares open-mouthed.
ANGLE AT DEAD END
The motorcycle runs out of road, out of options.
DIFFERENT ANGLE
K.I.T.T. skids up broadside, blocking any possible exit.
Michael jumps out. The cyclist, smaller than expected,
tries to run but Michael tackles him. They struggle.
Michael pulls off the helmet.
CLOSER ANGLE
It's Carrie. She stares back at him defiantly.
CARRIE
I don't care what you think, I'm
innocent. I am not guilty of
anything -- unlike you.
MICHAEL
What are you talking about?
CARRIE
Suzanne Westen. I saw you sneak out
of her room this afternoon after
your nasty little assignation.
Michael can't help himself. He laughs. She could tear his
eyes out.
MICHAEL
Carrie it wasn't what you think.
Now if you're so innocent, why don't
you tell me what you were doing
trying to break into Suzanne's
warehouse.
CARRIE
I think she stole my car -- either
stole it or had it stolen. I don't
trust her.
MICHAEL
I'm not sure I trust her either, but
that doesn't mean she's guilty.
Maybe if you and I put our heads
together we could narrow the field.
Deal?
She hesitates, finally nods.
CUT TO
EXT. MOTEL - DAY
Carrie pulls in on the motorcycle, K.I.T.T. and Michael
behind her. They start toward her room.
ANGLE AT HER DOOR
As they reach it, they notice it's open. Just then a
plainclothes Detective steps out, flashes his badge.
DETECTIVE
Carrie Haver?
CARRIE
Yes?
DETECTIVE
You're under arrest.
Carrie looks too stunned to respond.
MICHAEL
What's the charge?
DETECTIVE
Grand theft auto.
(off)
Charlie?
A second detective appears with a suitcase. He pops it
open. Inside are half a dozen expensive wigs. On their
reaction:
FADE OUT
END OF ACT TWO
ACT THREE
FADE IN
EXT. BARTON SPRINGS JAIL - DAY
A one-story municipal-type building, with K.I.T.T. parked
in front. Carrie storms out, Michael matching her brisk
pace.
MICHAEL
Carrie, whoever put those wigs in
your room tipped off the police. I
know that...You know it. It's not
going to do any good to yell and
scream.
CARRIE
Tell it to the boys in blue back
there. My car's stolen right out of
the show and the cops accuse me of
everything but running down that poor
guard -- and I'll bet that's next!
As they reach K.I.T.T., Michael steps in front of Carrie,
stopping her.
MICHAEL
What happened to our deal? I thought
we were going to work together.
She looks up at him, evaluating.
CARRIE
I'm not going to stand around being
your typical helpless female, Michael.
Whoever took my car isn't satisfied
-- they want me out of the way too.
MICHAEL
If you'll listen, I think we can
kill both birds with one stone.
Carrie's look becomes challenging.
CARRIE
I'm all ears.
MICHAEL
If the thief isn't interested in
selling me a car, maybe he'd like to
steal one from me.
CARRIE
I don't know what you're talking
about.
MICHAEL
How long would it take you to
customize a car?
CARRIE
Like the one they stole? About a
year.
MICHAEL
Since the show ends tomorrow, we'll
have to take a few shortcuts.
He opens the passenger door for her. She's looking at him
like he's speaking Lithuanian.
MICHAEL
I know just the place.
She gets in. As he closes the door:
CUT TO
EXT. HIGHWAY - DAY
The Foundation semi rolls along not far from Barton Springs.
K.I.T.T.'S VOICE
April, I can't believe you're parti-
cipating in this barbarism....
INT. SEMI - DAY
April's pouring over sketches and photos of customized cars
spread out near K.I.T.T. Michael's nearby, largely enjoying
K.I.T.T.'s protests.
APRIL
You know we wouldn't do this if it
wasn't absolutely necessary.
K.I.T.T.
Think how horrible you'd feel if
they put you on display in something
tasteless. Thank goodness poor
Wilton isn't here to see this sac-
rilege.
Behind Michael there's a beeping sound from the vidscreen.
MICHAEL
Yo, Devon.
We see Devon appear on the monitor. He looks very tense.
DEVON
Michael, I haven't heard from you --
are you making any progress at all?
MICHAEL
Depends on how you define progress,
Devon.
DEVON
I define it as recovering the
Pennington.
MICHAEL
In that case, no. But I've come up
with a new approach. I'm changing
tactics.
DEVON
While you're changing tactics, I'm
running out of time. Commander Smythe
is due in less than twenty-four hours.
MICHAEL
Maybe you can stall him.
DEVON
My dear boy, one does not stall
the Commander -- one survives him.
Behind Devon, we see a door open and a figure loom up. We
hear a booming, heavily English voice:
SMYTHE
Attennnnnnnshun!
Devon's face goes white. As he turns to face the music,
the image fades, leaving Michael and April in suspense.
MICHAEL
I guess the Commander arrived early.
APRIL
Poor Devon. Did you see the look on
his face?
April shakes her head and returns to her work.
K.I.T.T.
I think you're both being extremely
insensitive to the humiliation
involved here.
MICHAEL
Devon's?
K.I.T.T.
Mine.
MICHAEL
Kitt, we're not doing this for you
or for me. Think of it this way.
Even as we talk, innocent, beautiful
cars are being stolen and customized
-- against their will.
K.I.T.T.
(beat)
Against their will?
Michael nods gravely.
K.I.T.T.
In that case, we've no time to lose.
Proceed.
CUT TO
INT. DEVON'S OFFICE - DAY - CLOSE ON SMYTHE
Commander Henry Ashburton Smythe, to be exact -- a cross
between John Houseman, Winston Churchill and an English
Bulldog. At the moment, he appears on the verge of
apoplexy.
SMYTHE
You did what with the Pennington?!
WIDER TO INCLUDE DEVON
only slightly less apoplectic than Smythe, but with far
different motives. He is indeed winging it.
DEVON
I...had her entered in a car show.
SMYTHE
You put the Pennington Aston Regency
on display before commoners?
DEVON
Don't you see, Henry, such beauty
should be shared with the world.
Such majesty should brighten the
colorless lives of the poor, the
deprived....
Devon hesitates -- he's running out of sales pitches.
Smythe considers it, flattered in spite of himself.
SMYTHE
Yes, well, I suppose I can see your
point....
Devon is enormously relieved.
DEVON
You can? That's wonderful! Such
good news for the masses....
SMYTHE
Take me to the show at once.
DEVON
(stunned)
Take you? But, Henry...It's in Barton
Springs, a fair drive, and it's already
late in the day. What say we relax
with a good meal and drive up tomorrow
for the judging?
SMYTHE
(darkly)
There's nothing wrong, is there?
DEVON
Wrong? Certainly not. What could
possibly be wrong?
CUT TO
EXT. PAVILLION - NIGHT
Filled with noise and glowing with lights, this looks like
a sultan's oasis in a suburban desert. We see Jan and
Dean, their wallets out, counting out hundred dollar bills
and making notations. Then, palming the money, they hurry
inside.
INT. PAVILLION - NIGHT
The cars are amid a flock of festive, colorfully dressed
people. Tonight is, among other things, press night, and
photographers are everywhere. There's champagne and a large
buffet of cold cuts arranged to look like a food mobile.
ANGLE ON JAN AND DEAN
Several owners and girl friends clustered around as Jan
and Dean take bets on tomorrow's judging.
OWNER
What're the odds on the Longhorn?
DEAN
Even money. Bet a hundred to win
ninety.
OWNER
That doesn't sound like even money
to me.
JAN
There's a ten percent vig. You think
we do this to win friends and influ-
ence people?
Dean laughs, takes the Owner's money.
RAYBURN'S VOICE
Put me down for a thousand.
Reactions, and people turn to see Rayburn and Nora move
through the crowd, Nora acting as though everyone's got
leprosy. Rayburn enjoys the reactions, peels ten one
hundred dollar bills off a huge roll.
RAYBURN
You boys better run a good book, know
what I mean? 'Cause the Longhorn's a
shoe-in.
JAN
Can we use the jacuzzi later?
RAYBURN
Over my dead body.
Camera drifts away, picking up Suzanne with several press
people. She looks slinky and sexy.
SUZANNE
...and I like to think of these
shows as a microcosm of Americana,
a tribute to the spirit of good
clean competition.
REPORTER
I heard one of the cars was stolen
and a security guard run down.
SUZANNE
As I said, a microcosm of Americana.
They laugh, turn to see what a commotion near the entrance
is all about. People crane their necks.
ANGLE ON ENTRANCE
For a moment we can't believe our eyes. The car drawing
all the attention is K.I.T.T. -- recognizable but distinc-
tively customized, bright red and yellow flames, altered air
scoops, chrome extension pipes, etc. The smoked windows
glide down, revealing Carrie behind the wheel, waving to
the impressed crowd. Michael is in the passenger seat.
We follow the car as it moves toward Suzanne and stops.
Michael and Carrie climb out.
CARRIE
My entry fee's still good, isn't it?
Rayburn pushes his way through, furious. Nora clings to
his arm, trying to calm him with ad-libs.
RAYBURN
No way! No ringers! No late entries!
MICHAEL
It's not exactly a late entry, Rayburn.
Carrie had a car registered, and it
was stolen. This one's just taking
its place.
Jan and Dean love it; more action.
DEAN
The odds've just changed folks! Place
your bets!
Carrie stares at Suzanne, daring her to refuse.
CARRIE
Well?
Suzanne looks at her coldly. Then, noting the crowd's
enthusiasm, a careful smile crosses her lips.
SUZANNE
The girl paid her entrance fee. The
car is allowed to compete.
A cheer goes up. Suzanne meets Michael's eyes. Her
expression is every bit as daring as Carrie's, but a bit
more cryptic.
ANGLE ON K.I.T.T.
swarming with admirers. It's more attention than he ever
dreamed of. His scanner flashes boldly, to the ohs and ahs
of the crowd.
ANGLE ON HECTOR AND LEROY
Leroy is carrying a stack of ashtrays, Hector an armload of
empty champagne glasses. Leroy's eyes are glued to K.I.T.T.
LEROY
Now that's what I call a mean machine.
There ain't a cheerleader in the
world you couldn't get with that
car, Hector.
CUT TO
EXT. BARTON SPRINGS MOTEL - NIGHT
The Trans Am pulls to a stop and Michael and Carrie climb
out, laughing. He casually swings his arm around her as
they walk toward the rooms.
CARRIE
...and did you see Rayburn? I thought
he was going to jump right out of his
skin and fly all the way back to Texas!
MICHAEL
He could do that on his wife's broom-
stick.
They laugh and Carrie stops, faces him.
CARRIE
Have I thanked you for all your help?
MICHAEL
(smiles)
In your own way.
CARRIE
I'm not sure what that means, but it
doesn't sound right. It seems to me
I should thank a person in his way.
What is your way, Michael?
She is looking up at him, her mouth not far from his.
MICHAEL
Tell you what. If our plan works,
and the thief tries to steal Kitt
tonight, then you can thank me.
CARRIE
I don't think you answered my ques-
tion. So I'll just have to guess....
She pulls his head down and kisses him on the mouth.
CARRIE
Close?
MICHAEL
Close.
She laughs.
CARRIE
See you in the morning.
And she scampers up the stairs toward her room. Michael
watches her go, then turns and heads for his room.
INT. MICHAEL'S ROOM - NIGHT
Michael's key turns in the lock and he enters, closes the
door behind him. As he turns back to the room, he finds
himself facing a very sultry-looking Suzanne, carrying an
opened bottle of champagne and two glasses.
SUZANNE
Hi.
Michael's astonished to see her here. He glances toward
the door, then back to Suzanne as she slinks up to him.
MICHAEL
What're you doing here?
SUZANNE
I thought it was time to pick up
where we left off.
She wraps her arms around his neck, champagne glasses
clinking together.
MICHAEL
Suzanne, this whole thing...I'm not
sure it's what you think it is.
SUZANNE
You mean I'm not making myself clear?
I pride myself on making myself
perfectly clear.
She plants a very clear kiss on his mouth. Michael has no
choice for the moment.
CUT TO
EXT. BARTON SPRINGS MOTEL - NIGHT - ANGLE ON K.I.T.T.
as two shadowy figures move stealthily across the parking
lot. A guy and a girl pass by, walking and kissing, and
the two figures wait for them to pass, then continue toward
K.I.T.T.
INT. MICHAEL'S MOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
Champagne is poured into crystal. We widen to see Suzanne
close to Michael, raising the glass to her lips. Suddenly
his comlink buzzes.
SUZANNE
What's that?
MICHAEL
Ah...computer watch...Reminds me it's
time for my pills.
SUZANNE
You seem in perfect health to me.
He peels her off him.
MICHAEL
A miracle of modern medicine.
He escapes to the hall leading to the bathroom.
ANGLE IN THE HALL
as Michael speaks softly into the comlink.
MICHAEL
Kitt, what's up?
K.I.T.T.'S VOICE
We've got a bite, Michael. Two figures
are approaching me with malice in mind.
Before Michael can respond he sees Suzanne approaching, a
pistol in her hand.
SUZANNE
I think it's time we had a nice
little talk, Michael-whoever-you-
are.
OMITTED
ANOTHER ANGLE
as Michael returns to the living room, Suzanne following him
with the pistol. Michael faces her.
MICHAEL
All right, what do you want to know?
SUZANNE
Who you are. Why you're here.
MICHAEL
I told you.
SUZANNE
Then let's be more specific. Why
were you in my room today -- and
don't tell me it was passion,
unbridled or otherwise. I know
better. Because, you see, I also
saw you skulking around the ware-
house I rented an hour or two later.
MICHAEL
(beat)
I'm here to recover a stolen car.
SUZANNE
I don't believe you.
MICHAEL
If you knew the car and the circum-
stances, you would. The car is a
Pennington Ascot Regency....
CUT TO
EXT. MOTEL - NIGHT
as we see the figures coming closer to K.I.T.T. We still
can't make them out. We hold for an ominous beat; then
crash! One of them drops a toolbox, causing the contents
to spill towards us. Both figures quickly bend down and
start collecting them. It's Leroy and Hector.
LEROY
Good move, Hector. You just woke up
half the town.
HECTOR
How come I always gotta carry every-
thing?
(then)
Look, why don't we just forget the
whole thing. So far all they got on
us is maybe just intent to disturb
the peace....
LEROY
That's a humiliation, disturbing the
peace. What do you get if you dis-
turb the peace? If I get busted, I'd
rather get busted for grand theft auto.
At least it's got substance. At least
they know you were going for something.
ANGLE IN K.I.T.T.
as Hector and Leroy come up on the monitor. Over their
images we see a computer readout appear of their
identification: Where they work, past records, etc.
K.I.T.T.
Oh dear, what a disappointment. Small
fish in a small pond. Where in the
world is a good honest car thief when
you need one?
CUT TO
INT. MICHAEL'S ROOM - NIGHT
Michael and Suzanne as before, except now the pistol is
pointed at the floor instead of him.
MICHAEL
...so that's about it. That's why
I'm here. Why I was in your room
and at the warehouse.
Suzanne looks almost disappointed.
SUZANNE
I guess that old saying is true
after all.
MICHAEL
Truth is stranger than fiction?
SUZANNE
Stranger...and not nearly as inter-
esting.
She smiles, rises and puts the pistol in her purse.
SUZANNE
For what it's worth, I hope you catch
whoever stole your boss' car. What
people don't realize is the owners
of car shows hate the thefts as much
as anyone else. We build our image
on good clean family fun.
She kisses him.
SUZANNE
If you're ever in the mood for the
other kind, you know where to find me.
She slips out the door. Michael sighs, raises K.I.T.T.
immediately.
MICHAEL
(comlink)
Kitt, what's happening?
INTERCUT - K.I.T.T.
as Hector and Leroy work on K.I.T.T.s lock without success.
K.I.T.T.
False alarm, Michael.
MICHAEL
I thought someone was after you.
K.I.T.T.
They were. Are, actually. The trouble
is they're not professional thieves.
MICHAEL
How do you know?
K.I.T.T.
They're trying to gain entry with a
coat hanger and a Phillip's screw-
driver.
Michael is disappointed.
K.I.T.T.
Michael, the night is still young.
When these baboons get tired of trying
and go home, we'll be ready to catch
the real thief.
MICHAEL
For Devon's sake, let's hope so.
Good night, pal.
K.I.T.T.
Sleep well, Michael.
STAY WITH K.I.T.T., HECTOR AND LEROY
with a handful of bent tools, stop to reappraise the
situation.
LEROY
Can't figure it out for the life of
me.
HECTOR
Let's go home, Leroy. No cheer-
leader's worth this.
LEROY
(brightening)
I got an idea. Guaranteed to work
-- c'mon.
He stuffs his tools into the toolbox, hands it to Hector,
and they start away, back the way they came.
HECTOR
How come I always carry the toolbox?
ANGLE ON K.I.T.T.
K.I.T.T.
Thank goodness.
DISSOLVE TO
EXTERIOR - SUNRISE - STOCK
EXT. MOTEL - EARLY MORNING
K.I.T.T. hasn't moved. Alert, he picks something up.
K.I.T.T.
Oh no....
ANGLE ON LEROY AND HECTOR
as they stealthily approach with a portable generator and
electric drill. They reach K.I.T.T. and prepare to launch
a major assault.
K.I.T.T.
I see there's only one way to get rid
of you two.
ANGLE ON K.I.T.T.'S DOOR
as the electronic shield is released and the door softly
opens right in front of Leroy's drill.
HECTOR
You did it!
LEROY
(not so sure)
Yeah...told ya. C'mon!
They jump in, Leroy behind the wheel, Hector on the passenger
side.
HECTOR
Wow, lookit the dash! TV set an'
all!
LEROY
Told ya this car was special!
Before he can hot-wire it, K.I.T.T.'s engines roar to life.
K.I.T.T.
You ain't seen nothin' yet.
On their reactions:
EXT. MOTEL - DAY
The Trans Am bursts through the parking area, Leroy and
Hector hanging on.
FADE OUT
END OF ACT THREE
ACT FOUR
FADE IN
EXT. NEARBY STREET - DAY
The Trans Am appears on a quiet street, comes around a
corner on two wheels.
ANGLE IN K.I.T.T.
Leroy and Hector are white.
HECTOR
Will you slow down?!
LEROY
I'm not doing it, Hector! It's
driving by itself!
K.I.T.T.
Shall we take the scenic route, or
are you in a hurry?
They stare at the dash, amazed.
LEROY
Who said that?
HECTOR
Let's get outta here!
K.I.T.T.
No you don't. You wanted to steal a
car, and now you've stolen one. Hang
on for the ride of your lives.
ANGLE ON K.I.T.T.
He pulls into an empty parking lot, accelerates and then
does a 180.
INTERCUT - LEROY AND HECTOR
White knuckles and ashen faces as they're whipped around
by the 180.
WIDER ANGLE
as K.I.T.T. executes a series of 180s, one after another.
ANOTHER ANGLE
K.I.T.T. comes out of a 180 and skids to a stop. Both
doors pop open.
K.I.T.T.
Remember this the next time you
think about stealing a car.
They scramble to get out, do, but find they're so dizzy
they can hardly stand up. They weave like a couple of
drunks.
K.I.T.T.
Now get lost.
They head for safety, half-running and half-staggering.
K.I.T.T. pulls out, heading for the motel.
CUT TO
EXT. MOTEL - DAY
K.I.T.T. pulls in and parks in the same spot; it's as
though he's been there all night. We hold on the quiet
of the morning for a moment, then:
UNSEEN POINT OF VIEW THROUGH MOTEL WINDOW - ANGLE ON
K.I.T.T.
parked in the lot.
ANGLE ON WATCHER
It's Rayburn. He turns back into the room.
RAYBURN
You'd better hurry up.
ANOTHER ANGLE
Coming from the bathroom is Nora, though at first we may
not recognize her with the blonde wig and sexy outfit.
We do, however, immediately identify her as the woman who
stole the Pennington Ascot Regency from Devon two days ago.
NORA
How do I look?
RAYBURN
What d'you guess that black beauty's
worth?
NORA
I'd say about seventy-five grand.
RAYBURN
You look like seventy-five grand.
They laugh, enjoying themselves immensely. As they leave:
CUT TO
INT. MICHAEL'S ROOM - DAY
A knock on the door. Widen to see Michael, dressed, sipping
a cup of coffee as he crosses and lets Carrie in. Ad-lib
good mornings.
CARRIE
No luck last night?
MICHAEL
Not the right kind.
CARRIE
Then the drive to the show is our
last chance.
MICHAEL
(nods)
All set? You know exactly what to do?
She nods. They leave, Michael locking the door behind them.
CUT TO
EXT. MOTEL - DAY
Michael, alone now, reaches K.I.T.T. He climbs in, looks
around.
MICHAEL
Doesn't look like the amateurs did
too much damage.
K.I.T.T.
Michael, I am more than capable of
solving certain problems. There are
scientific ways to take care of these
things.
MICHAEL
What did you do?
K.I.T.T.
Scared their socks off.
Michael laughs, starts the engine.
K.I.T.T.
You seemed to take your time with
Suzanne last night.
MICHAEL
We only talked, nosey. And you can
forget her as a suspect.
K.I.T.T.
Then who does that leave?
MICHAEL
That's what I hope this little trip
will answer.
ANOTHER ANGLE
as Michael and K.I.T.T. leave the motel, heading for open
road.
EXT. TWO-LANE HIGHWAY - DAY
Devon's car appears, Devon driving, Commander Smythe
riding shotgun as it were. He seems expansive, in a good
mood, which is all the more disconcerting for Devon.
SMYTHE'S VOICE
Ahhh, there's nothing quite like
kippers for breakfast to set one
straight. It makes one yearn for
the wars, eh, Devon? To lead a
bristled gaggle of men into battle.
The clash of steel against steel.
Hand to hand...a lost glory in
our modern times.
DEVON'S VOICE
Yes, well why not tell me once again
about that time in Corten when you
were surrounded....
SMYTHE'S VOICE
(continuing)
We have to look for other 'medals'
these days. That's why the Pennington
means so very much to me.
DEVON'S VOICE
(sickly)
Yes...yes, of course.
OMITTED
EXT. ROAD - DAY
K.I.T.T. appears and passes. We hold for a moment, then
see an ND sedan appear at a faster spped, Nora in her wig
behind the wheel.
ANGLE IN K.I.T.T. - DAY
as they continue down the road.
K.I.T.T.
There's someone approaching us,
Michael.
Michael glances in the rearview mirror.
MICHAEL
Male or female?
K.I.T.T.
Female. Blonde, to be more specific.
MICHAEL
Bingo.
EXT. ROAD - DAY
The sedan draws closer, as if to pass, then smashes into
K.I.T.T.'s rear bumper.
ANGLE IN K.I.T.T.
Michael is jolted by the hit. He looks in his rearview
again, then pulls over to the side of the road.
K.I.T.T.
How unpleasant.
MICHAEL
Think of how other cars feel. They
dent.
EXT. ROAD - DAY
Michael gets out, purposely leaving his door open, walks
toward the sedan. The driver gets out. With the wig and
overstated outfit, it's even hard for him to recognize her.
NORA
I can't tell you how sorry I am. It
really was all my fault. I'm just
glad no one was hurt. You're not
hurt, are you?
MICHAEL
Not a scratch.
NORA
Thank goodness. These days you don't
know who to trust -- so many people
scream whiplash if you just wave at
them. Well, my insurance company
will pay for any damage to your....
She stops, suddenly and looks down at K.I.T.T.'s bumper.
Nothing. She looks at her bumper; it's a mess.
NORA
(taken aback)
Ummm, well, it looks like you got
off lucky.
MICHAEL
(helping)
There could be some internal damage.
Maybe I should get the name of your
insurance company...just to be on
the safe side.
NORA
(relieved)
Internal damage. Of course. Yes.
Would you be a dear and get me my
purse. I'm still a little shaky. I
left it on the front seat.
She smiles at him. Michael smiles back, then moves to her
car. As soon as his back in turned, Nora jumps into K.I.T.T.
A second later they are a cloud of dust....
ANGLE ON MICHAEL
He watches with satisfaction as K.I.T.T. and Nora disappear
down the road. He turns, looking the opposite way.
ANOTHER ANGLE
Carrie appears on her motorcycle, pulls in to a stop. As
Michael jumps on, Carrie sliding back to a "buddy-seat"
position:
CARRIE
It worked! Who is it?!
MICHAEL
You'll never guess....
CARRIE
Michael!
MICHAEL
Nora Rayburn.
On Carrie's reaction, Michael hits the gas and they zoom
out onto the road, Carrie hanging on for dear life.
CUT TO
ANGLE IN K.I.T.T.
Nora is enjoying the ride, the car. She notices K.I.T.T.'s
dash and instrumentation, begins to fiddle with buttons.
K.I.T.T.
Kindly keep your hands to yourself,
madam.
Nora looks around, startled.
NORA
What...?
Silence. Nora tries to reassure herself.
NORA
Oh...I see. One of those cars...
'Your fuel is low...please close the
door.' How unnerving.
K.I.T.T.
You ain't seen nothing yet.
Now she is really shaken.
NORA
Wait a minute -- They don't program
cars with bad English...
(then)
Maybe it's one of those foreign jobs.
That's it. Foreigners. They never
could learn the language.
CUT TO
EXT. DESERTED WAREHOUSE AREA - DAY
K.I.T.T. arrives, pulls to a stop in front of the warehouse
just as another car inches out...and out and out; it's the
Longhorn, all forty feet of her. Buck Rayburn at the
wheel. He climbs out, glances admiringly at K.I.T.T.
RAYBURN
Beautiful -- just beautiful!
(giving her
a kiss)
Nora, I don't know what I'd ever do
without you! Did you have any trouble?
NORA
Not at all. It's a strange car
though. It speaks horrible English
and virtually drives itself.
RAYBURN
That's power steering, honey.
(then)
Come on, let's load her up.
ANOTHER ANGLE
As Nora drives K.I.T.T. into the warehouse, we see several
huge cargo containers, the kind used to drop onto flatbed
railroad cars.
ANGLE BEHIND WAREHOUSE
Michael and Carrie glide up, engine off. They see the cargo
containers and K.I.T.T.
MICHAEL
So that's it ---
CARRIE
What?
MICHAEL
How your car disappeared yesterday.
They ship the cars out on trains, slow
moving freights. They probably just
drove it up into one of their boxcars.
CARRIE
There she is! My car!
Before Michael can stop her Carrie bolts for the warehouse
like a mother finding her long lost child.
MICHAEL
Carrie! Wait!
WIDER ANGLE
Rayburn turns and sees Carrie running towards him. He
immediately pulls a gun from his jacket and takes aim.
MICHAEL
(comlink)
Kitt!
K.I.T.T. responds immediately and in a split second is
between Rayburn and Carrie, just as Rayburn begins firing.
The bullets ricochet off K.I.T.T. in a shower of sparks.
Carrie continues toward the warehouse, oblivious. Rayburn
empties his gun, then seeing the driverless car come towards
him, turns and jumps into the Longhorn, tearing out.
K.I.T.T. heads towards Michael.
ANGLE IN WAREHOUSE
Carrie comes running in, stops, shocked.
CARRIE
(horrified)
My car! It's ruined!
A hand suddenly grabs her from behind.
ANOTHER ANGLE
It's Nora, grabbing her from behind. The two women
struggle, Carrie managing to break free. Michael appears
at the entrance.
MICHAEL
Carrie! Are you okay?
CARRIE
Stay out of this! She's all mine!
Carrie grabs Nora and flips her, sending her into a muddy
spill-off ditch. Her hot wardrobe is a mess.
K.I.T.T.
Michael, shouldn't you stop this?
MICHAEL
I think Carrie's got everything under
control. Come on...that Longhorn's
got a good head start, pal.
Michael jumps into K.I.T.T. and they roar off.
ANGLE ON CARRIE AND NORA
Nora pulls herself up from the ditch, a muddy wreck. She's
furious, assumes a karate stance.
NORA
I must warn you, I'm highly skilled
in karate.
CARRIE
Yeah?
Carrie throws a punch, a hard right, and Nora falls back
into the mud.
CUT TO
EXT. HIGHWAY - DAY
The Longhorn speeds down the highway, taking up both lanes,
causing an occasional oncoming car to turn off the road.
We can see K.I.T.T. gaining speed behind him. Every time
K.I.T.T. tries to pass the Longhorn, it shoots over to the
other side, preventing K.I.T.T. from passing.
ANGLE IN K.I.T.T.
Michael continues to try and pass the Longhorn.
K.I.T.T.
Michael, he's got twin compressive
Tynsonic engines. He's faster than
he looks.
MICHAEL
We've got to stop him before he
causes an accident. He'd rather die
than give up that car.
(beat)
Got an idea, Kitt.
K.I.T.T.
Michael, you can't be thinking of
turbo boosting over the Longhorn.
The length far exceeds my designated
limits.
MICHAEL
Limits are only in our minds, pal.
K.I.T.T.
And bones are in your body.
MICHAEL
Well said. But since they're my
bones....
Michael hits Turbo Boost.
EXT. HIGHWAY - ON K.I.T.T.
as it suddenly surges up and starts over the Longhorn. It's
a long way to the front end.
RAYBURN
He looks incredulously out his side window at the flying
car above him.
K.I.T.T.
as he flies all the way over the Longhorn, missing the
horns on the hood by inches.
RAYBURN
He reacts stunned to see K.I.T.T. now in front of him. His
precious Longhorn is about to be branded for life. He slams
on his brakes, spinning out in a cloud of burning tires and
dust. He just misses K.I.T.T.
FULL
Michael jumps out of K.I.T.T. as Rayburn climbs out of the
Longhorn. He swings at Michael. Michael ducks and flips
him with a judo move. Rayburn lands on his back -- out
to the world. Michael hears a motorcycle, looks up.
ANOTHER ANGLE
Carrie drives up on her motorcycle. She is covered from
head to toe with mud, but her triumphant smile shows through
all the same. She jumps off the bike and runs to Michael,
throwing her arms around him.
CARRIE
We did it!
She looks at Michael's clothes, realizes; he's almost as
muddy as she is. They laugh.
K.I.T.T.
Mud may strike you as hilarious,
but not me.
K.I.T.T. closes his doors. His windows darken and he
begins to inch away from Michael.
MICHAEL
Kitt!
K.I.T.T.
You two are not getting into me
until you both have a thorough
steam-cleaning!
MICHAEL
Kitt! Come back here!
K.I.T.T. refuses. Michael and Carrie look at each other
and laugh....
FADE OUT
END OF ACT FOUR
TAG
FADE IN
EXT. PAVILLION - DAY
A very uncomfortable Devon stands with Smythe, who grows
more restless by the moment. K.I.T.T. is nearby. Devon
is showing Smythe some of the novelty cars.
SMYTHE
Devon, I have seen this car twice
now! Where is my Pennington?
DEVON
Did I show you the customized Packard?
SMYTHE
Twice. Devon I insist you take me
to the Pennington immediately.
We hear a very distinctive horn: it's Michael, in the
Pennington. He drives it up to Smythe. Devon issues a
huge sigh of relief.
CLOSER ANGLE
as Michael gets out. Devon immediately walks over to the
rear of the car, and stands there -- still smiling, but
rather rigid.
MICHAEL
(to Smythe)
Just wanted to polish her up a bit.
A small group of admirers gather. Smythe is flattered.
SMYTHE
She is a sight, I must say. Devon,
you were quite right. Commoner
people should experience her beauty.
ANOTHER ANGLE
Carrie comes out of the pavillion. She holds a large first-
prize ribbon.
CARRIE
Michael, I won! Even with the
scratches! I don't know how to
thank you!
(kisses him)
I'm still going to think of a way....
She gives him a shy smile, then runs over to some of the
other drivers to show them her ribbon. Michael smiles,
walks over to Devon.
CLOSER ON DEVON AND MICHAEL
Michael gives Devon a friendly pat on the shoulder.
Devon's smile seems a little forced.
DEVON
Good work, Michael.
MICHAEL
Devon, are you all right?
DEVON
I'm all right as long as I never move
from this spot.
Devon motions to the Pennington's bumper: We see the small
but painful dent where Nora hit it.
MICHAEL
(smiles)
I'm sure you'll think of something.
See you back at the Foundation....
Devon glares. Michael grins, climbs into K.I.T.T., waves
as he leaves.
ANGLE IN K.I.T.T.
MICHAEL
Oh -- almost forgot.
He takes a small yellow ribbon out of his pocket.
MICHAEL
For you.
K.I.T.T.
'Honorable Mention?!' How insulting!
MICHAEL
(smiles)
Don't take it too seriously, pal. You
know how these contests are -- all
political.
K.I.T.T.
I'd like to give those judges a piece
of my mind.
Michael laughs.
EXT. ROAD - DAY
as Michael and K.I.T.T. hit the open highway and accel-
erate....
FADE OUT
THE END
